Time lost

Time lost. You could take this phrase in many contexts. Today, I wonder though. When is the last time you had an experience where you lost track of time? Many believe time is a gift. It shouldn’t be wasted or taken for granted. Seize the day, people boast! In a day to day capacity, I think I tend to agree. I like to make life happen as much as I can, create positive outcomes. But those moments in life when you had no idea what time it was or how long you’d been in your current state of bliss, when was that? You know? When time stands on it’s own and you are living completely in the present? Do you believe in luck or fate? Do these life elevating pods of time happen because you let yourself go in the moment of luck and fate or does everything happen for a reason?

I find myself in a state of intrigue and confusion. I hate the idea of losing time, but I love the idea of time lost. Why does it matter? For me, I began this year with the intent to live a “limitless” existence. Yes to everything! I find myself exhausted on a day to day basis now. Somehow, instead of leading a journey of limitless experiences, I was launched into a state of shock and unbalanced disorientation. I set my goals but can’t stay on track. My head is traveling a million miles an hour and in so many directions that I can’t follow one. It is the short, sweet, delicious moments in life that really make you want to live it, don’t you think? I feel myself passing through them all, too tired to enjoy them. Where is my time lost? I’m busier than I’ve ever been, but I’m not on the right track. It’s time to let go of this idea of zero limitations. I do have limitations, and I’ll set them for myself thank you very much!

I tried something new, and it didn’t work out. As a matter of fact, I think I fell on my face with this one. I’ve accepted it. Now I’m moving forward. That’s the beautiful part of life if you choose to live it according to your own rules. Change your course. There is a time to push yourself to a breaking point, and there is a time to recognize your failures and turn them into stepping stones and move on. Don’t worry if people are watching. Let them watch. Ultimately, this is your life and your journey. Do what works for you. I’m looking for more time lost without wasting more of my time trying to find it.

Cheers to all of you beautiful humans who are taking chances and finding success and failure as a natural part of life. You are living! Don’t be so hard on yourself. When my kids come to me with full tears in their beautiful eyes after a hard fall, I know just what to say to them. Today, I whispered it to myself.

Brush it off, Sweetheart. It will all be ok. Let’s be brave and try again.  

yogababy2Yoga Baby ~ watercolor pencil 9×12 illustration 

Hey there little dreamer. Love your uniqueness! There’s no need to compare. You are amazing!



4 thoughts on “Time lost

  1. I know the feeling of having so many ideas running around my head. It often paralyzing me and I can’t seem to move forward with any of them! I find it helpful to write everything down. Then my mind feels more clear and I can look at the list and make decisions. (Although sometimes I can’t get past the list making and take action. I get stuck in the planning.) I think it makes sense that after the huge project of your book – a long time goal of yours – that you are finding it hard to pick a new direction. It’s probably normal to have some aimless time after being so focused for so long. Thanks for sharing my friend! xo Eileen

  2. I see no failures from your brushes, only gifts of which you should forever be proud. Time is only ‘lost’ if empty, with nothing left to show for it. You have formed friendships, inspired others, created magic, surpassed goals and set positive examples for your children, just to name a few. Hold your head high, Alisa, while looking toward the future.

  3. Oh Alisa there is no failure you are closer than ever to where you are suppose to be. Good on you for pushing your boundaries. You are an inspiration to me, your art is unique and beautiful. Stand tall recognise the learning and keep going. I can’t tell you how many times I worry that my dreams will never be done. But each day I steal a little time just for me and slowly things evolve…..I say slowly because it has taken me two years to get to this point with my art and I am still battling the demons of picture illustrations not being good enough in my mind. Love your elephant, so very sweet. Made me smile….and that my friend is where the magic lies.

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